So, the day has mostly gone down hill from there. The house is a wreck from the weekend (I have to be extra on top of the house over the weekends or things just spiral quickly), and I woke up in a terrible mood because I did not wake up early as intended. Well, I was woken up at 5 am, with Ada lying beside me in bed crying (she doesn't even wake me up in the middle of the night; she just climbs in), and she explained that she had had a bad dream. So it took a while for either of us to go back to sleep, so I kissed my 6 am wake up call good-bye. And I spent most of the morning having a pity party for myself over the size of my little house. There are a few things that are put on hold right now due to the size of our house, and I am not having the best attitude about it today. But, it was so encouraging for me to hear that other moms, who most likely live in more normal size homes (I should say American normal, because goodness knows this house is a mansion compared to a lot of the world!!), also have a hard time waking up before their children...so, really, it's just the way life goes with young children and really has nothing to do with the house I am living in. The house that really has been mostly a blessing, I should add, I just have a bad attitude today. It's a great little house, and we are very thankful for it, but today I just feel like pitching a fit.
And isn't it funny how our children's moods feed off of our mood? Or at least that is how it works at my house. So, Ada's attitude hasn't been great, and I haven't been kind or gracious, as we all gathered in my tiny kitchen (you can see what I am fixated on today), while I tried to clean it up a bit and go over our memory work at the same time. And Ada couldn't remember a thing, and I was frustrated. And it was sin nature in full force.
So, we have hugged and said I love you, and at this moment, I am allowing Ada and John to indulge in cartoons while I work on CC stuff for tomorrow (in-the-classroom day) and eventually plan to straighten the rest of the house. I don't have the energy this afternoon to "train" the kids in cleaning up with me. Instead, I just need to get the house cleaned up so that the rest of the week won't go so badly.
I'm so thankful for grace. And a new day. Tomorrow is a new day with new mercies. Amen?
5 comments:
after i got off the phone with you our reading time was a NIGHTMARE. I kind of lost it as did Hannah. Our afternoon got really rocky. Thankful again that His mercies are new every morning. press on friend.
LB, you are doing a great job. Life is hard. I was just looking at this week and thinking about how draining it's going to be...and almost dreading the days ahead. BUT, his mercies are new every morning, and we all have to take it ONE day at a time. You can't look too far ahead or you'll get overwhelmed. Sometimes, I take it one hour at a time. Take a deep breath; walk outside; sit down and read for a minute. The laundry can wait. The mess will be there. Your sanity is more important!
And yes, the weekends are always hard when it comes to the mess. I actually let it go on Saturday and get Adam to help me come Sunday afternoon. That way, we are all neat and ready for the week to begin.
You are doing a GREAT job. Just breathe. And take it moment by moment!
Amen...we've all been right there with you. Me, probably just as many times, if not more. And can I say, the book I mentioned to you, has at this point {knock on wood} been a tremendous blessing because it is working. Seriously. I have read so many books before this that I won't waste the time naming, but the typical ones everyone recommends, to no avail. This book however is changing our daily life so far. I pray we can keep pushing along implementing these things, but if you are wanting to revamp things, this has been wonderful so far! Ok..I'm done :)
I'm usually a silent stalker, but I just wanted to let you know that you are one of the most inspiring people on the internet for me. And I spend a LOT of time on the internet :) I love every single word you have ever written, and I can say that with complete honesty because I have read every single post you've ever published on this site. Even though we've never met and we've barely communicated, I feel like you get me in a way that few other women would. I love when you have bad days and share, and I love when things are going great and you share. I love your brutal honesty (and let's face it, in blogworld, you get a LOT more of the roses and unicorns than you do the dirty and poop, you know?) and I love that even when you don't realize it, you have this hope and...perseverance? That's not exactly the word I'm looking for, but it's the best I can do. You just seem to keep on keeping on and I can't get enough.
So thankyou. Your words are making a difference in at least one life, and I wanted you to know.
I just wanted to chime in on the house thing, because I know that for me, it is sometimes helpful to hear from someone who has been there (and is still sort of there!) especially when it feels like you are surrounded by people who have "normal sized" houses. Up until six months ago we lived in a tiny two bed/one bath duplex with our two kiddos while my husband was in grad school. Our bedroom was right across from theirs and the bathroom was between the two, so we had to be super stealthy to get up before they did, and it often didn't work. Of course, even now that we are in a slightly larger place, they still seem to hear us! But anyway, I get where you are coming from with some of the frustrations and limitations of a small house...90% of the time I was happy there and just thankful to have a home, but I had my moments of breakdown about the tiny kitchen, how hard it was to entertain, how unattractive it was, etc. I think it was especially hard because we had lived in a larger house and then downsized while he was in school. It was just too easy to remember the other place, right? Even now, our home is very modest and it is easy to compare myself to others, but I am asking the Lord to give me contentment and to show me the many blessings, both tangible and intangible, of our home. Let's be honest--I can barely keep this place put together, so what would I do with a larger home? :-) Anyway, thanks for sharing so openly--your transparency is really inspiring!
Also, I want to know which book Margaret is talking about!
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