Headed Out

I'm loading these two stinkers into the car and heading out of here early tomorrow morning.  Yes, you guessed it, back to Alabama we go.  It is a sort of last minute trip.

You see, for weeks now it's been, we're going, we're not going, we're going, we're not going.  And then a couple of days ago my Friday tutoring student rescheduled to next week, and I got the word that Sarah will be home from New Orleans, and Kate will be in town, and Ann (who, have you heard?, is pregnant with her FOURTH!!!  There is nothing like the excitement of brand new life!!) will of course be there, since she lives there, and the original reason for going was for a baby shower for Esther Bratton's little Charlotte (due to arrive very, very soon)

 so...

We're going.

And that's where we'll be 'til Monday.

Happy weekend, everyone!!!

No TV = Big Giant Mess

I like the idea of turning off the television; it's what it does to my house that I don't like.

Confession--later that day, I put Up in the dvd player, and I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned.  It was long overdue, and I didn't think a little movie watching would do much damage.

As much as Ada needs to turn off the tv, I need to turn off the computer!!  Yesterday, as I was checking blogs, Ada said to me, "mom, do you want to come eat a picnic?"  How could I say no?

Milestones

We spend most of Friday night in here, with no success.

And then, Saturday morning, finally success, and a reward.

John is reaching milestones of his own.  His milestone involves a spoon and a mashed avocado.  He loved it.

In the mean time, Ada is trying my patience at every turn.  Oh my word, the third year is promising to be a challenge.  I want to pull my hair out most of the time.  Our main problem is ATTITUDE.  Any advice?  I say a million times a day to Scott--I don't know what to do...We have timed out and pinched and talked and taken things away and practiced the right way to respond...and still, the attitude remains.  I am serious about the advice.  I would love some right about now.  I love her so much, but we spend most of our days at a stand off, and I don't think this is how it is supposed to go.  Last night right before bed, Scott, Ada, and I spent time tickling and cuddling and laughing, and it was such a treat to end the day with lots of laughter from Ada rather than whining and tears.  How can I make that happen throughout the day?  I do not know.  I am praying lots, though.

The Gospel Truth

Now this, this, is what I want my children (and myself and Scott and all of us) to know and live...

“The secret of gospel change is being convinced that Jesus is the good life and the fountain of all joy. Any alternative we might choose would be the letdown.”

- Tim Chester, You Can Change (Wheaton, Ill.; Crossway, 2010), 15.

(From Of First Importance)

A Few Things

1.  We went to the cardiologist today, and as we suspected, everything is A-okay.  They did an EKG (correct terminology?), an ultrasound on John's heart, and the doctor listened to his heart.  They did find a tiny little hole in his heart, which is apparently very, very common.  The doctor said there is the tiniest little chance that is what is causing the breathing episodes, but he also said that most likely, John just gets very angry, and that is what causes the breathing episodes.  We might be facing some tough toddler years, but we will certainly take that over heart problems!!!  The hole should close on its own, but we go back in six months to make sure.  At that point, if the hole is not closed, we will do further testing, but the cardiologist has been practicing for 30 years, and he said he has never had to do further testing on a baby because the hole didn't close up, so we assume that everything is going to be just fine.

Little John was a trooper.  The ultrasound technician suggested that we grab a bottle or pacie to keep him content during the ultrasound, and I said, bad news, he won't take either.  Instead, I let him suck on my finger.  Gross?  Maybe, but it kept him happy for a while.  Then he started getting very upset and kicking those chunky monkey legs of his and thrashing his arms.  The technician said he is a mover and we are in trouble when he starts walking.  We actually might be happier when he is mobile because maybe he will be happier.  Then we went back to the room, and he was able to nurse until the doctor came in, and if he is nursing, he is a happy little camper.  He had to miss his morning nap for the appointment, so I let him nurse away in order to prevent the fussiness that was threatening to take over.

Anyway, we are glad that we went because now we know that he just has a temper.

2.  This is on its way to our house because someone is turning THREE in just a couple of weeks.

Let me confess that Ada specifically asked for a pink tricycle because, in her words, "pink is my favorite color."  (She says this all the time!!)  But I ordered red.  I wanted something that could be passed down to John, and I think a red tricycle is oh so classic, so I am hoping she will be so excited about the trike that the color won't really matter.  (Mom, I am having much sympathy for the predicament I put you in that Christmas when I asked for the bike, but really Ann needed the new bike.  I officially understand the fact that parents have to make the most rational decision when it comes to those things).  We have decided to keep things simple and not do a friend party this year.  I think we are going to do lunch at Chick-fil-a, give her the tricycle after her nap, and do cake after dinner.  We have looked at the cakes at Publix, and as of today, she picked a crayola cake, which makes sense.  She loves anything having to do with paint, drawing, crayons, etc.  I was a little sad because I could picture such a cute themed birthday party surrounding the crayola cake, but, oh well...not this year.

Of course, all family is welcome, but we assume it will just be the four of us, and I think Ada will love that it is her special day. 

And that is what is happening in our house tonight. 

For Fun

In an effort to avoid cleaning up the kitchen, I have been perusing the J. Crew website. 

I started by looking at the crew cuts clothing.  I am a bit obsessed with J. Crew's children's clothing, and if I had more money in my pocket, Ada's wardrobe would most likely be made up of mostly J. Crew clothing.

Well, while at the website, I saw the weddings tab, and I just couldn't help myself... I clicked on it.

Any other women out there who still like to look at wedding dresses, after the fact? 

Well, I saw this dress and told Scott that I wish we could have another wedding so that I could wear this dress.  He said I was crazy, but it's still fun to dream. 

I even tried to get him to get off the couch and come see it to tell me if he liked it or not.  He didn't budge.

Okay, reality check:  my husband, who I already married while wearing a different wedding dress than the one above, is on the couch folding clothes, our two children are upstairs asleep (thank you, Lord!), and I need to get off my tail and go finish the kitchen.

Longing

In my new found space out in the early morning air, I have found much needed time to pray as my feet hit the pavement over and over again.  It's been refreshing, to say the least.

The thing that I pray the most, that I ask for over and over is that we--Scott, me, Ada, John, any others that he might bless us with--that we would love Him most.  That we would love Him and His word and that the loving would direct all of our steps.  That our whole lives, every minute, would be surrendered to Him, to His will, not ours.

She is only two (three, really), and I pray that she already would long to know Him more and more and more. 

Lately she says a lot, "I want Jesus to come to my house.  I want him to play with my kitchen and in my pool, and I want to ride on his shoulders."  I didn't know how to explain that though we can't see him, He is here, so I called my mom.  Mom got on the phone with Ada and explained that when she is much older (Lord willing, she has many, many years left here), older even than Near and Mae-Mae (mom's words, not mine.  I don't think they are old!!) that she will go to Heaven and she will see Jesus with her eyes, face-to-face, but until then He is here and we can talk to Him the same as if we could see Him.  Well, she listened hard to those words, and then it was settled.  She now will say, "Hey, Jesus," to the air and smile really big, and I say, "yes, He is here."  But today, that wasn't enough, I suppose.

We were riding in the car, on the way home from the pool, all quiet and tired, and all of a sudden she says, "mommy, I am older now, can I go to Heaven today?  I want to see Jesus today.  Please say yes, mommy."  I said, "no, baby, not today, as far as I know, today is not the day, but remember you can talk to Him anyway, even though you can't see Him" and she said, "but please say yes, mommy, I am older now."  I once again explained, that we hope she will be much, much older before she sees Jesus.  Oh I selfishly hope that she has many years to go, but I also hope that she never stops longing for Him and for her true home. 

I pray it again, "Please Lord, give her a heart to know and love you and your word.  Let her always long for more of you!!!"

I Found Some Space

Remember that space I was craving? 

The Lord delivered in a big way this past weekend.

First of all, I ended a long, tiring Saturday with time on the couch in my pajamas.  John went to bed, and Scott and Ada headed to Chick-fil-a for a date night, and I just sat in disbelief of the quiet around me.

I used that time on the couch to think and pray and plan. 

I spent a lot of time reading this blog for some practical advice on how to be more intentional with my days, and then I woke up very early on Sunday morning and slipped downstairs while the rest of the house was asleep.

Oh the quiet.  Oh the peaceful way that day began.  I listened to some praise music, I spent time in the word, and I finally got outside for that run.  And I was the only one out there.  What space I found.  It was heavenly. 

There was much room to run and breath and pray and think and prepare my heart for the day.  The task in front of me.

And when I made my way back home and opened that door, I immediately heard little feet running down the hall upstairs, and then, there it was, that familiar sound, "Mommy!!!!"

And despite my sweaty self, she hugged and hugged and hugged.  (She was alarmed to wake up and find only daddy at home). 

I have always been a morning person, so that hour in the morning to start the day on my own is much needed.  And, taking the suggestion of this blogger, I began the day listening to this song because it certainly echos my heart's prayer.  It's crazy because I used to listen to this cd as a student at Auburn.  After I saw the suggestion on the blog, I dug through my old cds, and sure enough, there it was.  I can hear the words playing in my altima at the stop light on College, yet it now echos my heart most in this town I had never even heard of back then.  Here are the lyrics--

Invade
Watermark:  Purest Place

Come, come in
Invade all You see of us
Any man, who'd walk Your road is welcomed here
And You're the only one

Jesus, come and walk the halls of this house
Tread this place and turn it inside out
With Your mercy...


Jesus, teach us the prayers that open these doors
Until Your light floods in and illuminates these floors
And let Your truth be on our steps and in these rooms
Jesus invade...

Reach, reach in
With the hand that heals all our suffering
Conquer all that is not of You
Bring Your spirit through
As we fill these walls with Your praise


By the way, waking up this early is only possible because John is doing so well at night.  He usually wakes up around 5:30, which is just when I want to wake up anyway.  I feed him, put him back to bed, and head downstairs.  It is bringing much order to my previously chaotic nights and mornings.  I am so thankful.

Big Girl

Three is quickly approaching.  Three years since we began this thing?  I can't believe it.

I had a few goals for three--potty trained and no pacie and the big girl bed.

She is potty trained (except for naps and nights, but we're getting there), and we have big plans to trade that pacie in for something much more appropriate for a big girl (dress up clothes, maybe?).  It's coming.

And today, finally, we put the baby bed away (we have all the parts, Ann, don't worry), and she is officially sleeping in a "big girl bed." 

Her bed room is in process.  Our entire house is in process.  Most days that drives me crazy, but I deal with it.  But we plan to tackle the rest of her room next Saturday.  I want to paint all of her furniture black and distress it and add fun drawer knobs.  And we need bedding.  I am going with white to balance out the black.  I think it will be fun and give her room to grow.

Can you tell that she is thrilled? 

p.s. those steps go with our master bed (a hand-me-down from my parents), but they are perfect for her to get in and out of her bed.  It was her idea.

Space

I am needing some space today.  Space to breath and run and think and move and remember who I am beyond motherhood.

I spent my 18th summer in China, forming relationships with students in an effort to share the gospel.  By the end of that summer, I was tired and hot and used up.  I was completely empty.  I remember walking around my campus, the air so thick and gray, praying and asking the Lord to fill me up.  I was there so that the Lord could pour me out, but there was nothing left to pour.  I said, "Lord, you will have to fill me up.  There is nothing left."

I am feeling like that today.  Very empty.

These kids, this family, they need me to pour myself out, but I don't feel like there is anything in here to pour.  All week I have felt aimless.  I wake up and stumble about, going through the motions, eyes barely open.  And I know that this is not motherhood at its best.  There has got to be a better way.

I set my alarm for 6 am.  I had big plans to get up before the rest of the house.  I needed the quiet.  I wanted to slip out the door, and run, hoping that in the slap-lift-slap-lift of my tennis shoes on the pavement, and in the breath-pray-breath-pray of the run, I would come home filled up, with a bit more purpose in my mothering and homemaking.

But then, John woke up at 11:30 and 1:30 and 3:30 and 5:30, and 6 am was just too much.  7:45 am also felt like too much, but I didn't have a choice at that point.

So...I am still on the quest to find some space.  I have to figure out how all of this works together--the mothering, and the "wifing," and the writing, and the teaching, and the running, and all the parts of me that are me.  He knit me together after all.  I don't think he meant for me to lay everything else aside when He made me mom.  I think it is those other things that make me this mom. 

So... I am going to find that space.

Five Months

On Monday, John had his four month check up (though he is actually five months as of last Thursday; we are a bit behind, which is so typically us!!!)

For the most part, everything was looking great.

The doctor and the nurse commented on his strong legs and strong grip.  He kept grabbing the paper on the table that he was lying on, and we would have to pick him up and get it straightened out.  It's really funny because Scott and I both possess a normal amount of strength, and it could probably be argued that my strength level falls in the weaker range, but our children tend to be strangely strong.  Ada can move things twice her size, and John seems to be following in her footsteps.

Anyway...he weighed in at 15 lbs 8 oz, putting him in only the 40th percentile.  I was surprised because he seems like such a chunk to me, but Ada was also in the 40th percentile at his age, so we'll see, I guess.  Ada didn't drop to the 1st percentile until she started walking around.

Things to note at 5 months.

This seems to be the month.  The time I have been waiting for since six weeks.  Overnight John has become a much happier, much more content baby.  He smiles much more easily now, and he even attempts to laugh.  He is definitely showing a preference for me, and he usually cries when left with anyone other than family.  He didn't do this with my parents or Scott's parents, so maybe he can already sense that they are his family, even though he doesn't know them well yet. 

He is still a cuddle bug, and I kiss him all the time.  I can't get enough of those sweet baby cheeks pressed up against mine.  And the smell, oh my goodness.  I really am savoring his babyness more than I did with Ada.  I want to soak it up--memorize every aspect.

Thanks to finally letting him cry-it-out a bit, he is waking up usually once a night around 3:30.  This is amazing to me considering that a week and half ago, he was waking up four or five times a night.  He continues to be a great nurser, and his weight gain is great, so I am holding off on solids for a little bit longer.

He is loving to turn over, and seems to prefer his stomach both for sleeping and playing.  He also enjoys the bumbo for short periods of time.

He loves Ada, and Ada adores him.  She usually wakes up before him in the morning, and she gets so excited when he wakes up, jumping up and down when she hears him on the monitor.  She loves to talk baby talk to him, hug him, and kiss on him, but she gets very possessive of her toys, and she doesn't like it when she recognizes her old toys that John is now playing with.  He is only five months old, and I am already having to make her share.  I can't wait to watch their relationship develop over the next few years.

The other thing to note about John is his tendency to get very, very upset.  So, upset, in fact that he forgets to take a breath and turns a bit blue.  That is why I say that, for the most part, everything went well at the pediatrician.  He has been doing the hold his breath thing since the first night he was home from the hospital, and the home health nurse gave him his antibiotic shot.  He used to have these "episodes" as often as once a day, but lately he rarely does it.  Though the last two Sundays in June, he did it in the nursery, and the workers came and got me because it is a rather frightening thing to watch.  I mentioned it to the doctor, and John ended up having an "episode" after the nurse gave him his shots.  The doctor and the nurse (and me) think that it is probably nothing, just a tendency to get upset and not be able to calm down--I am thinking his personality might come from me ;)--but the nurse was a bit concerned just because it takes him so long to breath after this happens.  So...after witnessing the episode, the doctor is sending us to a pediatric cardiologist as a precaution.  Again...this is truly not a big deal.  To quote the pediatrician, "we live in a metro area where a pediatric cardiologist is available, so why not get it checked out."  So, really, I don't think he's concerned.  But... we are going next Thursday. 

And I think that is all of the significant five month things. 

I can hardly remember what it was like before John.  Isn't that the way it goes?  These tiny little lives have a way of weaving into the family and making their presence so very known, so very necessary, and there is no going back.  Ever.  We love him so, and are so thankful for his little life.  Our little John Thomas.

Full Weekend

Here at the Moore household, you will most likely find us relaxing at home during the weekend. 

There was a time, back before children, where I wanted us to go, go, go all weekend long (which caused many an argument during that first year of marriage), but now that I am a mom, by Friday, I am exhausted, and I like to soak up time at home with Scott here to help. 

Plus, I am discovering that during this infant stage, when John is napping three times a day, it just isn't easy to get out of the house much.  Ada was a car seat sleeper, so I would load her up, and she would nap on the go.  John, however, requires a bed, so we are simply staying put during this season of life.

But this weekend was somewhat of an exception.

We began the weekend with Cow Apprecation day at Chick-fil-a.  I heard about this last year, but I didn't have the nerve to dress us all up like cows.  This year, I decided to swallow my pride and head out for some free food.  Besides, Ada was thrilled that we were all dressing up like cows.  She called me, "Mommy cow," but when I called her "baby cow," she reminded me that she is not a baby, so I changed it to, "little girl" cow.  I also recruited some friends to meet me at Chick-fil-a, so that I was not alone in my "get up."  Here is the only picture I could get of Ada.  She did not want me to take a picture, but I snapped a quick one anyway, as Scott was getting John settled in the car.

That was Friday night.

Saturday morning we did what we do every Saturday morning, we grocery shopped.  We are up and at 'em so early on Saturdays anyway, and I have found that the grocery stores are fairly empty that early on a Saturday, so the whole family does a weekly run to Kroger and to Publix.  I have to be able to think in order to coupon, so Scott drives Ada and John around in one grocery cart, and I take my own cart and we all meet back at the check out when it's time to go.  Ada really enjoys the grocery trip each week.  See the picture below to understand her excitement.

Ada came home with two balloons, two stickers, a sucker, and a cookie.  Really, grocery shopping is the highlight of her week.

And then, the best part of the whole weekend, I went out to dinner and movie with my women's bible study from church.  What. a. treat.  I can count on one hand the number of times I have been to a movie theater since Ada was born.  That is just one thing you cannot do with a child in tow.  It was such a needed break from the norm, to say the least, to have quality, uninterrupted, girl time with these dear, dear women.  (Really, the Lord has given me such Godly women to connect with here in my little corner of GA).  Plus, these women worked around John's schedule, and we ate dinner near my house, so that I could run home and feed him before the movie.

I am really soaking up John's baby stage, more so than with Ada.  Perhaps because this time around I better understand how fleeting it is.  I am relishing the cuddles, the smells, the baby sounds.  However I am also remembering what a lonely stage this is.  We truly are homebound most of the time, due to John's nap schedule.  I find myself longing for adult interaction.  This weekend met that need in abundance.  Thank you, Lord, for the litte things.

Tiny Tiger

I woke up this morning to find that we were completely out of diapers.  Well that just wouldn't work, so we immediately loaded up and headed to Target.

And there I found this on the clearance rack for 2.00.

He is a tiny tiger.  A tiny Auburn tiger!!!

Keeping a record

1.  We are surviving the heat with a backyard baby pool, and the next door neighbor's slip-n-slide. 

2.  This little guy is rolling all over the place.  He just started this yesterday, and he loves it.  It makes for happier awake times because he can entertain himself as he rolls all over the living room.

3.  John is also going through "sleep training" this week.  While in Alabama, he started waking up all night long, eating every two hours, sometimes more often than that.  I was exhausted and feeling like we were back at week two.  So...I am now making him "cry-it-out" if he wakes up before the four hour mark.  So far, things are going great.  The last two nights he woke up after three hours, cried for about five minutes, and then went back to sleep for another hour or two.  We have gone from nursing four or five times a night to one or two times a night, so vast improvement!!  Happier mom.  Happier baby.

4.  Finally, we are trying to finish up Ada's potty training.  She is fine going tee-tee in the potty; it's the "other thing" we are having so much trouble with.  She's still in a diaper at nap and bed time, so she just waits until then and avoids using the potty.  I am trying to remember to put her in panties as soon as she wakes up to alleviate that problem.  I am ready to be done with potty training.  It's no fun.

And that is our house this week. 

I feel better having updated.  I don't have any sort of baby book for little John, so if it's not recorded on the blog, it's not recorded.  And you know the first year--it's one milestone after another. 

Oh, one last thing--feedback please.  Ada's birthday is just around the corner, and I cannot decide if we should stick with just family or invite a few little girls over.  Any advice?  Is three still too young to really care about a birthday party?  I am leaning towards just family, but could be swayed if anyone has a different opinion.  For some reason, I am having the hardest time deciding. 

Okay, I am really closing this now.

Dear Blog

I am sorry that I have neglected you so.   Please forgive me.

These two munchkins are taking up all my time.

And, in the very rare moment when they are both asleep at the same time, I am usually sleeping too.  So that leaves little time for you, little blog.

I promise, I will return later today to give you the attention that you need.

don't give up on me.

--LB

Cavity Free

Do you remember all the dentistry drama from last summer--root canals and fillings and everything else all while first trimester pregnant?

Well, yesterday I went to the dentist for the first time since all of that happened.  And I am so happy to report that I am cavity free.  I have terrible teeth, despite my best efforts to brush and floss correctly (okay, I could probably put forth more effort in the floss department), so it is a rare visit to the dentist that I walk away with no cavities to be filled.  I was relieved, and may finally be able to make the big switch to a Georgia dentist.  We'll see.

In the mean time, Ada is soaking up the time with her cousins.  (And John is eating and fussing and eating and fussing in typical John-fashion, all while getting to know his cousins a little bit better).

(here, Ada and Ellie are getting "murried" as Ada says.)